Can't Stop
by Bandbabe
Summary: Sequel to "Losing My Favorite Game"; As things begin to heat up between Adam and Bianca they struggle to make sense of their attraction, while others begin to catch on - Bianca/Adam pairing. Eli/Clare/Drew POVs. Chapter 18 up!
1. Can't Explain

"Can't Stop"

Summary: As things begin to heat up between Adam and Bianca they struggle to make sense of their attraction, while others begin to catch on. (Bianca/Adam pairing. Eli/Clare/Drew POVs)

Author's Note: This is a sequel to "Losing My Favorite Game". This story has multiple points of view.

Rating: M

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

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1-

**Bianca's POV –**

Adam Torres. If you told me two days ago that I'd kiss him, I would have laughed and thrown a bitchy comment your way. I hated him. That _freak_. He was a liar and I never understood why he was so calm, even when I tried my hardest to break him.

Fixation lends itself to attraction. And attraction can quickly become obsession. Now I can't get Torres out of my head.

As I walk down the hall I'm untouchable. I am cold. I am feared. I am in my element. No one else knows that inside I'm bouncing off the walls. Last night we slept together. It was unexpected and inevitable at the same time. It was also the best sexual experience I've ever had.

When I turn the corridor I see him at his locker. He is alone and once again I debate talking to him. His eyes fall on me and I can see his appreciative gaze. '_He's checking me out_,' I realize.

A smirk slides onto my face as I draw closer. I don't understand why we're drawn to each other, but for now I'm not concerned with figuring it out.

We lock eyes and my heart beats faster.

"Freak," rolls of my tongue when he's in earshot. It lacks its previous malice and I can tell that Adam picked up on my playful tone. As I pass him, I reach out and push his shoulder. It's a light touch, which is more of a caress.

Adam plays it off like I used more force than I did. I can feel his eyes on me as I continue down the hall.

**Adam's POV –**

I couldn't pry my eyes off of Bianca DeSousa if I tried. I can still feel the warmth of her hand where she touched my shoulder. I have a light feeling in my stomach as I realize she stills desires me and that yesterday was no aberration. I wonder how long she has felt this way.

In the past 48 hours my whole world flipped on its head. One minute Bianca and I were enemies, the next we were making out like our lives depend on it. I can barely comprehend that this is the same girl who screamed at me, "Touch me again and I'll kill you" after learning I am transgendered. She took me home and let me touch her all over. And she touched me too.

"Adam!" I hear from me behind me. I force the memories of yesterday out of my mind.

I turn and am face to face with my closest friends, Eli Goldsworthy and Clare Edwards. I can detect a slight frown on his face. Clare's eyes are following the retreating figure I had been intently watching.

"Hey guys," I say in cheery tone hoping to avoid any questions. I'm not in the mood for an interrogation, not when I'm feeling so good.

"Seriously, dude?" Eli questions.

I close my locker with a little more force than I intended. "What?"

**Clare's POV –**

I look at Adam with concern. I'm not stupid. I can tell something is going on with Bianca. After all, I saw them together two days ago. The image of Adam and Bianca furiously kissing is burned into mind.

"How can you like someone who insults you?" I hear Eli ask. "Even after you kissed," he adds lowering his voice.

Adam flinches. "Look, I know you guys are looking out for me, but you don't understand," he starts.

"Then explain it to us," I counter. He looks taken aback.

"Please guys, just drop it," he pleads. "I've got to go to class. Catch up with you later."

Eli and I stand there for a few seconds, watching him go.

"We've got to do something," Eli tells me as we hurry to science class. "Bianca is bad news and he's only going to get hurt."

"I know." I frown as I try to think of what we can do to help our friend.

-oOo-

**Adam's POV –**

For the first time in ages, I am looking forward to Fourth period. When I enter the room for Remedial Gym everyone is there and already breaking into groups.

"Mr. Torres," the ballroom instructor says marking down my attendance. "Please find a partner. We have an even number of students today." I nod and look around the room, not daring to make eye contact with Bianca. To my surprise she walks up to me.

"Let's give this thing a try," she says.

I gape at her in confusion. I fully expected to sit on the bleachers, watching everyone else dance. The last time a male student was absent his partner, Kelby Jennings, refused to dance with me. She acted annoyed any time my eyes fell in her direction.

"Are you sure?" I ask. My voice came out higher than I wanted.

She looks at Kelby who is chatting with a tall blond guy. "My partner has two left feet. Her partner dropped this class, so I offered to switch. Despite everything you're a much better dancer," she says in a neutral tone.

"Okay, I guess," I concede.

**Bianca's POV –**

I bite my lip to hide my smile as Adam agrees to dance with me. My outward demeanor is nonchalant and he plays along, as to not give us away. I stare at him for a few seconds, anticipating the feel of his skin.

"Alright, everyone take your positions!" our instructor orders.

Adam gently takes my hand in his. His other hand finds its way to the small of my back. I let out a little sigh and redouble my efforts to concentrate on my breathing and executing the steps properly.

He is smirking a little. When I raise my eyes to his, they are so intense that I look away. I know what we are both thinking about at the moment. The lowered lights remind me of my bedroom. I wish that we were alone so I could rip his clothes off. I know Adam isn't comfortable being fully naked, but I'd settle for as much skin to skin contact as possible. I catch my wandering thoughts and focus on the present. It's then that I realize how safe I feel in his arms.

.

tbc

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A/N: Let me know what you think. This is the first time I have multiple first person POVs going on. Does it work?

Also, unlike my other stories this a work-in-progress. Still writing it, but I have confidence I can update it in a timely fashion!


	2. Something's Up

"Can't Stop" – Part 2

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

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2-

**Adam's POV –**

After class we are all smiles as I follow her out. We now have a legitimate excuse for our continued interaction.

"Not bad for a sophomore, but you still have more to learn," she teases me.

I lean closer to her. "We definitely have a shot at an 'A' for the final project. Would you like to practice after school?" I inquire. Perhaps I'm pushing it.

However, she nods, seeing right through my offer. "I'll find you after Detention."

"Cool." I walk off to lunch.

**Drew's POV –**

As I grab my Math textbook I see a strange sight further down the corridor. My brother is talking to Bianca. I wrinkle my forehead in confusion.

"What?" I say aloud. I can't fathom what they would have to say to each other, besides the odd insult, and I'm determined to find out.

After Math I have a study period. I chat to a few girls in the hall before heading to the library. It's not a place I venture often to, but right now I need answers. I head to the back rows and smile when I locate my prey.

Eli and Clare are sitting together, flirtatiously chatting while pretending to care about the various books in their laps. I feel awkward interrupting them, but this is important.

"Hey, can I ask you guys something?"

**Eli's POV –**

I lightly brush Clare's hand with mine. "See, I told you my hands were cold."

She giggles. "They're not that cold!" she exclaims in a hushed tone. We're trying to keep our voices down because of our location. Out of nowhere I see Drew Torres. He asks us to talk.

"Sure, what's up?" Clare asks.

He looks a bit uncomfortable. He quickly sits down next to us in on the floor. In a quiet tone he asks, "I saw Adam talking to Bianca. What's going on with him?"

Clare and I share a look. Internally, I debate what to tell him. Drew would freak if he knew about the kiss. "They're partners in ballroom dancing again. Someone dropped out."

"WHAT?" He almost yells. Controlling his voice he asks, "Why would he partner with her? I don't see why he would even talk to her after all that has happened."

I knew Drew was referring to the insults and outing of Adam's transgender status. However, what happened between Drew and Bianca also hung in the air.

"He doesn't want to fail remedial gym. They have final showcase at the end," Clare offers.

Drew frowns. "He needs a new partner! I'm going to talk to him." He stands up. "Thanks guys. He's lucky to have friends like you," he adds. With that he leaves.

Clare and I share a guilty look. There was no way we could tell him about the changing nature of Adam's relationship with Bianca.

"Maybe we should," Clare says after a long silence. "He's obviously concerned. Maybe he can talk some sense into Adam."

I shake my head. "It's not our place. It will only make things worst!"

"We have to do something," Clare states. I nod in agreement.

.

tbc

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A/N: Hmm, Drew's in protective older brother mode..

Thanks for the reviews! :D This was a short chapter. Will update soon.


	3. Closer

"Can't Stop" – Part 3

Summary in part 1.

Author's Note: Thanks for the encouragement guys! I wrote a few more chapters today, so I decided to update!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

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3-

**Adam's POV –**

The end of the day couldn't come soon enough! I anxiously flip through my comic in the empty dance studio. It was finally 4 o'clock. Every few seconds I glance at the door, waiting for Bianca to appear. Suddenly she does.

"Hey," she says with a seductive smirk and walks towards me. I tingle with anticipation. She stops right in front me. "You ready?"

Her eyes hold a challenge. Two can play that game, I decide. I grab her hand and get into position. Staring into her eyes, I smile before saying, "We don't need music. Let's focus on technique."

I begin to move and she follows. We softly keep count. We flawless execute the routine taught today, and then choreograph some moves of our own. In the past, I was never much of a dancer. However, when I joined this class and spotted Bianca I watched every video about ballroom dancing that I could get my hands on. She's a natural at this so we flow well together.

"Alright, let me pause the music!" she laughs after a half hour or so. Midway through our practice we had turned on the record player.

I sit down next to her on the bench. "Getting tired?" I tease.

I watch her smile as she downs some water. "A little," she admits. "But there's something else I rather do."

I follow her eyes to the storage room. I look back at her to confirm if I understood her correctly. She abruptly gets up and starts walking towards the room. When she reaches the door she throws me a look over her shoulder. I immediately get up and follow her.

Once inside, she reaches behind me to close the door. Somehow over the sound of my heart beating fast, I can hear her voice beckoning me to come closer. I acquiesce and hungrily bring my lips down to meet hers. Time is an abstract entity as we give into our desires. She presses into me and runs her hands down my back as I explore the shape of her hips with my hands. Our tongues battle for dominance as we slide into a new round of discovery.

I have no idea why we are doing this again and I don't care. In this moment all that that matters is that she's in my arms. We can't go as far as we did yesterday, not when we're in school and have limited time. It doesn't surprise us when my cell phone rings 15 minutes later.

After a few lingering kisses, I pull away. "I have to get that."

I know that it's Drew calling. It means practice has ended and we have to meet Mom out front. When I hang up I turn to Bianca and she has a pensive look on her face.

"I have to go," I say. She nods. I walk over to her, close but not _too close_ in case anyone happens to walk by. "See you tomorrow, partner."

She smirks and runs her hand up the length of my arm to my shoulder. "Count on it."

**Drew's POV –**

Adam runs up to me a little winded. "Hey, what happened? You're usually out front early," I ask.

He shrugs. "I was in the dance lab."

"With Bianca?" I ask. Disgust is present in my tone. He gapes at me surprised. After a moment he recovers.

"Spoke to Eli and Clare?" he questions.

"Of course! And I know everything." I couldn't keep the annoyance out of my voice. "Adam, you and Bianca are a bad idea."

Adam refuses to meet my eyes. I continue, "There has to be someone else you can dance with. She has been nothing but rude and disruptive to you. Why should you have to interact with someone like?"

He looks up quickly. "If I don't participate in the showcase I'll fail remedial gym."

I sigh. "Clare mentioned that. I'm still worried about Bianca causing drama. I mean, she doesn't like you and she goes out of her way to make it known," I explain.

"Drew, we came to an understanding." I raise an eyebrow. He continues, "Besides, we dance well together."

"Didn't stop her from ripping your shirt open," I argue. I still get worked up every time I think about that incident. Adam flinches and I feel bad for bringing it up. To raise his spirits I concede, "But, if you think you can handle it…"

Adam smiles as I trail off. A moment later we see Mom's car pull up in front of us. Adam hops in the back, leaving the front seat to me. Mom inquires how our day was and I tell her about the new plays we did in football practice. In the mirror I see Adam tuning out with his headphones.

Later that evening, I knock on Adam's door. "Hey man," I say as I enter the room. Adam is sitting at his computer.

"Sorry about the interrogation earlier," I tell him. "It's just that with all that happened this year, I don't trust that girl. I don't want to see you hurt if she's plotting something."

Adam considers my words before responding. "You don't have to worry, Drew. I can handle this, and honestly Bianca and I have stopped feuding."

"Really?" I snort.

"Well, I guess we'll be cool until we finish this assignment," he laughs. I feel a lot better, though I am still apprehensive. I want to believe him, but something about Eli and Clare's demeanor today made me feel like there is some part of the story I'm missing.

.

tbc

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A/N: Please review :) They're lovely to read.


	4. Take It Back

"Can't Stop" – Part 4

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

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4-

**Bianca's POV –**

I take a long drag of my cigarette and watch the smoke slowly fade away. I have study period, but am spending my time outside the building near the parking lot. It's fourth period, but today is Thursday. I have Remedial Gym with Adam on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

"Hey, got a light?" K.C. Guthrie walks toward me with a self-assured grin. All last week I flirted shamelessly with him, but now I couldn't care less. Inwardly I groan.

"Sure," I hear myself say. I reach into my bag for my lighter. When I look up K.C. already has cigarette in his lips and leans towards me. Not so subtle that he wants me to light it for him. I oblige him and he smiles. He moves away slightly to take his first drag, but he keeps his body angled close to me.

"So, do you have plans after school?" He asks keeping his eyes on mine. I nod.

"Yeah, I have plans," I tell him. I take another drag.

He raises his eyebrows a bit. "Why don't you break them?" He suggests. "Whoever he is can't be as interesting as me," he teases.

I laugh and look away. He's quite cocky for sophomore. Then again he's not the only one. I absently notice he wears a beanie just like Adam.

"It's not like that. You know, occasionally I do school work," I say in a mock tone.

K.C. chuckles. "Yeah, well another time then?"

**Eli's POV –**

I slam my car door as I emerge with Physics text book in hand. As I walked back to the school I see Bianca and K.C. flirting. I narrow my eyes and immediately feel dread. My suspicions about Bianca have been confirmed. Adam is going to hate me for telling him this, but I have to.

Fifth period is English with Mrs. Dawes. Clare and Adam are also in this class. I try to listen as she goes on about A Midsummer's Night Dream, but every so often I glance over at Adam. He is focused and seems in normal spirits. I am reluctant to say anything at all.

At the end of the class Clare looks at me with an appraising eye. "What's wrong?" she asks.

I raise an eyebrow. Not wanting to waste time, I decide to be forthcoming. I lean closer to her and whisper, "We need to talk to Adam."

**Clare's POV –**

I look over Eli's shoulder and spot Adam right before he heads out to door. "Hey Adam, wait up."

He turns around cautiously. "Lunch?" I plead.

He looks at me, then Eli. After a moment his face softens. "Okay."

The three of us fall easily into conversation. For awhile we pretend there are no disagreements or secrets tearing us apart. After getting our trays Eli suggests eating outside. We plop down at our favorite table and begin eating our food.

"Clare, I'll trade you my chocolate milk for plain," Adam says. I smile. He is the only kid I know who dislikes chocolate milk.

"Deal."

I listen to Eli and Adam talk about the latest comic book, and then debate the best song on Dead Hands' latest album. Being left out of the conversation you'd think I'd be bored, however I was savoring the calm before the storm.

**Eli's POV –**

"Do you want to grab food at the Dot later?" I ask Adam. Lunch was going so well I preferred to delay telling him what I saw.

Adam pauses before responding. "Actually, I have plans."

Clare and I share a look. Perhaps it's better to rip the band-aid off.

"Adam, I have something to tell you," I start. He tenses up. "I had to get something from my car earlier. On my way back to the school I spotted Bianca and K.C. together. They were flirting."

Adam blinks a few times. After a few moments I continue, "I'm sorry, man."

"Maybe you misinterpreted what happened," he says.

I instantly roll my eyes. He adds, "I know you hate Bianca, but you shouldn't jump to conclusions."

I can't believe he's defending her! "I know what flirting is! I know this isn't want you want to hear, but she's not the right girl for you," I say defiantly.

Clare touches my arm. "Guys, calm down," she says trying to keep us civil. Unfortunately, we are in argument mode.

Adam gives me an icy stare. "Look, you don't what you're talking about. I _know_ she's into me."

I snort. "This is the same girl who gives out blowjobs in the boiler room." I know I'm being cruel but I couldn't stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

Adam's mouth is tight and his eyes are shooting daggers. I feel guilty and instantly try to backtrack. "Hey, I'm sorry—"

Adam interrupts me, "Go on, Eli. Finish what you meant to say!"

I am at a loss for words. I haven't seen Adam this angry since he confronted Fitz. I knew he'd be crushed but I don't understand why he's directing all his frustration at me. "Look man, all I'm saying is Bianca hooks up with tons of guys, Adam."

"And you're so concerned for me because of that alone?" he questions.

"Well, yeah. I mean, there are always going to be other guys," I explain. "She can't exactly take you to the boiler room," I quip.

Immediately I wish I could take the words back.

"So I'm just the transgendered freak who could never hold her interest," Adam states calmly. I wonder where the anger in his voice went. When I look up I can see the anger and hurt in his eyes. "If I'm stupid enough to care about her, she'll cheat and leave me for biological males. Thanks for that, Eli."

My mouth runs dry as I struggle to defend myself. "That's not what I meant!" I finally get out.

"What about you, Clare? Do you agree with him?" Adam questions sharply.

"Adam, you can't believe that Eli thought that!" I hear Clare respond.

"Right, you two are a package deal," he snorts.

"Look, we think Bianca's probably setting you up for something. You can't trust her motives after everything that's happened," Clare reasons.

"You think she's playing me?" Adam questions. His brows furrow, and I can tell it's the first time he considered this.

Crisis nearly averted – until I see Clare shaking her head too vigorously. I send her a pointed look, but the damage has already been done. Adam thinks we don't honestly believe Bianca could be attracted to him. Either it's a prank or an odd hook up. I mentally slap myself for being so heavy-handed with this conversation.

"Well, some twisted game she must be playing," he says in a clipped tone. He turns to me, "You're right about the boiler room. Not our scene. But she did take me home. She was _very_ satisfied. Actually, we _both_ were."

I am stunned into silence. Adam abruptly gets up from the table and walks away. After a long moment I look at Clare. All I can think is '_Fuck_'.

.

tbc

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A/N: Lots of movement in this chapter! Let me know what you think :D


	5. Right or Wrong?

"Can't Stop" – Part 5

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

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5-

**Adam's POV –**

I drop a bomb on them then bolt. This is not how I expected lunch to go.

As I walk away from the picnic table I am on fire. I want to hit something. Or perhaps scream. I really need to be alone right now and decide to settle for the handicap bathroom. Everything is a blur and I arrive in no time.

I splash water on my face, and then rest my arms on the sink. I stare at my reflection and my self-loathing rises. I feel like an idiot for trying to reach out to Eli and Clare.

Lunch was going great until Eli trashed the girl I like for her past. He then went on to imply I wouldn't satisfy her because I don't have the anatomy of a "real" man. Eli's words were patronizing, insulting, and it cut deep hearing it from a "friend". Worse, it reinforces all my insecurities about being involved with Bianca.

I let out a wry laugh. At least Eli thinks Bianca could possibility be attracted me (albeit for a short non-committal fling). Clare sees us making out and assumes Bianca is doing it as part of some elaborate prank.

'_With friends like these_,' I think. I idly wonder what Drew would say about this. I don't think he would object to it for the same reasons as Eli and Clare, though he would certainly bring up the same points.

I sigh. No, I think Drew would ask me _why_ I'm hooking up with her. He'd wonder if instead of burning myself, I found a new way to hurt myself – getting involved with someone who has treated me like dirt for months.

As I seethe in solitude, it takes awhile for the first part of Eli's speech to hit me. At the picnic table I was certain Bianca wasn't flirting with K.C. However, as time passes the thought begins to gnaw at me. '_What if she is interested in K.C_?' I question. He's popular, handsome, and was born male. Again I sigh. We never discussed being exclusive.

The bell rings and it's time for 7th period. I leave the bathroom and head to my locker to get some more loose leaf paper. As I round the corner, I spot Bianca talking with Fitz and Owen in the distance.

I pause for a moment, debating whether to continue on. I watch her laugh with her friends and feel a pang that she's just fine without me, while my life is falling apart. I see what Eli sees – why would a girl like that be with a guy like me?

I abruptly turn and head directly to class. The extra paper isn't worth it.

**Bianca's POV –**

I hate science class. In real life chemistry can be fun and intoxicating. The anticipation of a first kiss. The rush you feel when you accidentally touch. The heat you feel with you intentionally touch. It's addictive. In chemistry class I have to listen to Mr. Garrety's monotone lectures, read from textbooks that bore me to tears, and look on with disinterest as my lab partner completes our work. He loves science and is from the gifted program.

"Alright! We're almost ready," Wesley Betenkamp says excitedly. I roll my eyes. I wasn't paying attention to our experiment. "Okay, all the components have been mixed together in the Bunsen burner. Let's turn on the flame!"

I found it amusing that he spoke as if we actually worked on this together. "Whatever," I say dismissively as he turns the dial.

We wait for several seconds. True to form, the blue liquid quickly turns red. Wesley smiles widely and gives me two thumbs up.

"Good work," Mr. Garrety says as he walks over to us. "You are the first to finish."

"Thanks Mr. G!" Wesley exclaims.

Mr. Garrety turns toward me and I can see the strain in his eyes. "Bianca, how many drops of universal indicator did you guys use at the start of this experiment?"

I fight the urge to scowl as I look away. I don't get along with most of my teachers, so it's no surprise this one has it out for me. Behind him I see Wesley frantic mouthing numbers. Perhaps it's worth a shot.

"Twenty five," I answer defiantly. He raises an eyebrow and then turns to look at Wesley. The boy is terrible at feigning innocence.

Mr. Garrety frowns. "That's correct. However, if you want a passing grade in this class you'll need to be more involved Miss DeSousa," he lectures. I glare at him as he walks over to critique the next pair of students.

"That was close," Wesley says quietly.

I shrug, "No proof, no foul." He slightly smiles. I return to my stool and look at the clock. The day is almost over. I've got one more class then detention. After that Adam and I have dance practice. I smile at the thought. Yesterday left me wanting more.

I still don't get it. I doubt anyone else would either. I've been so mean to Adam. Recoiled in disgust when I realized he had boobs. Repeatedly taunted him for being transgendered. In the past few weeks rarely a day has gone by where I haven't hurled the insults "tranny" or "freak" at him. Yet, I can't deny that I am irresistibly drawn to him. I don't understand why, but I _want_ him. That attraction has been there for awhile. Probably since our first dance, and it never went away.

Suddenly my phone beeps. I fish it out of my bag and smile when I realize I have a text from Adam.

_**Can't meet today. Football practice cancelled. Sorry – Adam T.**_

I furrow my brows. What does football practice have to do with anything?

"Oh," I say aloud as I realize he means Drew's football practice. Without it both boys are heading home early. I'm disappointed but I won't let it show. I text back a nonchalant reply.

"You okay?" I hear. I look up annoyed to see Wesley standing beside me.

"What?" I sneer at him.

He blinks nervously, "It seemed like you got bad news."

Am I really that transparent? I never used to be. "Why don't you stick to analyzing formulas?" I say derisively and turn away from him. I don't need his pity.

By the time detention rolls around I'm itching to get out of here. I need to be far away from this place. I'm sick of dealing with the thoughts in my head. I just want to tune out. Get some smokes. Grab some beers. Perhaps I'll head over to the Ravine and see what's going on over there. Owen and Fitz should be around tonight.

A note is thrown on my desk. I snap out of my reverie and glance around the room. My eyes settle on K.C. He sends me a flirtatious smile. I smile back and then return my attention to the note. There are just two words followed by a question mark – "Boiler room?"

.

tbc

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A/N: Uh oh, cliffhanger… Let me know what you think.


	6. Remember the Time

"Can't Stop" – Part 6

Summary in part 1.

Author's Note: Ok, there's a bit of heat in this chapter. Adam + inappropriate thoughts. You've been forewarned…

Rating: **Definitely M**

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

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6 –

**Drew's POV –**

I look over at Adam and frown. We're sitting on the couch in our living room watching the second X-Men movie for the millionth time. It's one of Adam's favorite movies but he's clearly not enjoying it. I can see that something is weighing on his mind.

I nudge him. "Who moved your cheese?"

He continues to stare at screen until a delayed reaction kicks in. "What?" he asks startled.

I laugh. "He's alive!"

Adam looks at me annoyed. "What do you want?"

"I was just wondering, why the long face?" I inquire. He's not like himself. "I thought you'd be happy. You didn't have to hang around waiting for me _and_ you got to skip practice with Bianca."

I see him flinch and raise an eyebrow.

"Sorry, I'm just out of it," he says quickly.

"Okay, still not enough information," I push.

He sighs, "Got into an argument with Eli and Clare."

Now I'm really confused. "What? Why?" I ask alarmed.

He's already shaking his head, trying to downplay it. "It's nothing. It's just that they can be really judgmental sometimes."

I frown. "That doesn't sound like them," I comment. The wheels turn in my head. "Is this about Bianca?"

He gives me a death stare. "No."

I break out laughing. Okay, that was a long shot. But I'm still troubled that I don't know what could have sparked an argument between the three friends.

"Fine. You don't have to tell me," I concede. "But I am here whenever you want to talk. You know that right?"

He nods. I smile as we turn our attention back to the TV. I feel a little better now that we talked. Adam seems more relaxed too.

**Adam's POV –**

I keep my eyes glued to the television. I feel awful. I'm used to keeping my problems to myself. I need time to work through them before I feel comfortable opening up. However, Drew can read me like a book. He usually draws it out of me and we resolve it together. But not this time. I lied to Drew right to his face and he believed me.

I sneak a look at my brother. He's watching Ice Man freeze a cup of tea with a small smile on his face.

This is my favorite part of the movie. I can relate to Ice Man's anxiety as he reveals who he is truly is to his family. Unlike him, I am thankful that Drew and my parents didn't turn their backs on me. The fear is still there though. Of being different. Of being misunderstood. It hurts worse when the people closest to you don't get you. That's why thinking about the argument I had with Eli and Clare is so painful.

I have to admit, they're just trying to make sense of something that defies explanation. I can't even explain why Bianca and I are hooking up. Like them, part of me feels it will only end badly. I can't talk to Drew about this. Not now. I'm already confused and I don't want to alienate him too.

I suddenly stand up. Drew looks at me curiously.

"Do you want some pop?" I ask. I need to be alone for a bit.

"Uh, sure. Do you want me to pause the movie?" he offers.

I shake my head. "No thanks. I've seen it before."

Drew and I laugh. "Alright," he says and looks at the screen.

The first thing I reach for in the kitchen is a can of Pringles. It's BBQ flavor. I lean against the island as I enjoy the taste. My mind starts to wander.

Two days ago I was with Bianca. Alone in her bedroom. Followed her to the bed. I close my eyes as my cheeks flush. I chuckle, '_Better to have these thoughts here than in Math class_.' That was incredibly distracting.

I return my thoughts to Bianca. The girl is seriously sexy. That is apparent from her walk, her confidence, her teasing eyes, and her skin tight clothes which put her curves and amazing rack on display. And Bianca without clothes on? Honestly, I'm surprised my head didn't explode.

I laugh, '_Perhaps it would have if I had let her turn on the lamp._' Then again, the darkness added to the mood. With a heightened awareness I had taken in every moment, enjoying the sound of every moan, exploring her soft skin with my hands, and discovering the taste of her. I had kept my eyes on hers as much as possible, even in the low light.

Her touching me was incredible. I felt her hands run up and down my back, ruffle my hair, and then finally she just held me close to her. We continued to kiss all the while. I twitch when I think of what happened next. I never expected her to caress me the way she did. When she reached into my boxers I froze. The moment she made contact with me, I couldn't think. Just feel. It was the most intense pleasure that I could ever recall. I tried even harder to make her feel the same.

I sigh heavily at these memories. They're on loop in my head, confusing me even more.

Bianca and I exist in a place where rational thought has no bearing. It was pure need and desire. Of course analyzing it made no sense! Knowing that doesn't make it any easier to figure out what to do next. I still burn for her, and I know she stills wants me… at least for now.

"Dude, where's the pop!" I hear Drew yell from the other room.

I feel a flicker of annoyance. I have no desire to watch the rest of the movie. I'm so turned on right now, I'd much rather go upstairs and take care of business. '_Mom won't be home for another 20 minutes_,' I calculate. I shake my head. With a nosy brother like Drew I'm sure to be interrupted.

Resigned to my fate, I grab a bottle of Coca Cola from the fridge. "Just a minute!" I yell back. Today is just one of those days. Suddenly my phone vibrates.

I put the bottle on the counter and grab my phone. I figure it's probably Clare texting to apologize, again. Or maybe Eli this time. To my surprise it's a text from Bianca.

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: Two cliffhangers in a row! Hehe, I know I'm evil…

Reviews are awesome. Thanks and keep 'em coming ;-)


	7. Just Checking

"Can't Stop" – Part 7

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

7 –

**Bianca's POV –**

I'm pacing around my room. It's five thirty, I'm still home alone, and I'm wondering when did my life go to hell?

Let's back up shall we? In detention I got a note from K.C. He wanted to go to the boiler room with me. He was interested in hooking up. No strings attached. Simple and fun, well, with me doing most of the work. He's a cute boy. We flirted shamelessly last week. I could care less about his baggage – criminal past, pregnant ex-girlfriend. He could care less about my reputation. It was a no brainer, right?

I'm wondering about Adam. What is he going to say? When the hell did I start to care?

**Adam's POV –**

I open my phone to see a text from Bianca. Just the girl I was thinking about. Sexy, inappropriate thoughts.

_**Hey. Are we ok? – Bianca**_

I frown as I try to make sense of her question. Why wouldn't we be? Sure I could have cancelled in person, but she texted me back that it was cool. I am baffled why she's texting me now.

**Bianca's POV –**

A few moments later my phone beeps. I feel a bit relieved to read his message.

_**Yea. What's up? – Adam T**_

Now I feel stupid. I got insecure over nothing! So we didn't talk today, I guess it makes sense because we didn't share any classes. Adam cancelling our session doesn't mean he's having second thoughts. Now I'm annoyed with myself.

This is not me. I don't care what guys think of me. I hook up with them on my own terms.

K.C. is the perfect candidate for a classic Bianca hook up. Flirting with him is easy and doesn't put butterflies in my stomach. His eyes broadcast lust, yet they don't bore so deeply into mine that I feel a stirring in my soul. If he has a long chat with friends I wouldn't feel worried that they talked him out of being with me. And if I hooked up with him, I would feel fine continuing to hook up with other guys. He's interchangeable unlike Adam.

Whoa. What am I doing?

I need to end this train of thought and text him back. I'm sure Adam thinks I'm loopy right now. Especially because of the delayed response. I pick up my phone and write him back.

**Adam's POV –**

I've been sitting on the couch with Drew for the last ten minutes, when I finally hear back from her. I scoot away from Drew as I open my phone. I really don't want him to find out who I'm texting.

_**Just checking ttyl – Bianca**_

My eyebrows shoot up.

Despite being born one, it is apparent that I will never understand girls. What was she checking?

"Dude, are you alright?"

I look over and see Drew looking me with curious eyes. I guess I paused over the phone too long. I snap it shut.

"Yea, I'm cool."

"Who was that?" he asks.

"Who was what?" I stall.

He gives me a knowing smile. "You've been continuously checking your cell phone during the past few scenes."

I shrug. '_Dammit._' Why was he so perceptive? "It was a message from Clare."

His face changes, "Oh."

Another lie. It's official. I am an asshole.

"I'm glad they want to make amends. You guys shouldn't fight," he says supportively.

I nod. "Yea."

After he turns away I open my phone and text Bianca back.

**Bianca's POV –**

_**Ok. See u at school – Adam T**_

I lean back on my bed and stare up at the ceiling. Why am I obsessing over this? I just need to pull back a bit. Maybe I should go to the ravine tonight after all? Alcohol would definitely take the edge off. It's not like I could have a heart to heart with my best friend. I don't have any close female friends. Owen and Fitz are fun but I'd have to be drunk to confess my deepest secrets.

Then again, maybe getting drunk is a bad idea…

I turn my head and enjoy the feeling of the soft covers on my cheek. Suddenly I remember being tangled in these sheets two days ago – with Adam.

I sit up quickly. Looking around the room I find much of it reminds me of him. I can't touch my lamp without remembering how he told me to leave it off. At the time I thought it was an odd request, though in hindsight it made sense. He didn't want me to see him. '_He's not comfortable with his body._'

It's ironic. Once I found out what Adam was I hated his body. I was horrified that I started to like someone who had been born a girl. I hated him for deceiving me. In time I realized most of that anger was because that revelation meant we could never be. I had been considering going to the boiler room with him. That wasn't going to happen and I was mad at myself for still liking him.

When we were hooking up I didn't care. I was with Adam and his body was not a hindrance. He was making me feel good and I wanted him to feel good too. It surprised me how much. He is a guy between the ears, and while his body doesn't match up it doesn't change who he is.

I stand up. I know something that works better than alcohol and mindless hook ups to make me feel numb. I grab my book bag and head to the living room. I pull out a pen, notebook, and math textbook. I'm going to do my homework for a change.

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: Aha! No cliffhanger this time. Though it seems like something's going on…


	8. Confide

"Can't Stop" – Part 8

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

8 –

**Clare POV –**

It's an early day for me. I have a meeting with the yearbook committee in 15 minutes. I've got time to spare but I continue to walk in a brisk pace. Rather be early than late. As I come up the steps I notice a familiar face. Adam is sitting on the steps reading a comic book. I think of yesterday and instantly feel guilty.

Aside from the anger, I could tell Adam was truly hurt when he left the table yesterday. Eli and I spent the rest of lunch lost in thought. One thing was clear, more had happened between Adam and Bianca than we realized. However, we weren't sure what to believe.

After school Eli and I went to Dot. We spent a long time talking about Adam. Eli was convinced he'd never talk to him again. I told him he just needed to try hard to repair the friendship. I sent Adam seven texts last night and didn't receive a single response. I was starting to think Eli was right.

"Clare," I hear. I look up to find Adam staring at me. His expression is neutral and I feel even worse.

"Hey Adam." I stand there awkwardly, not knowing what to do next. After a moment he looks away and resumes reading his comic. I feel like the moment has been lost. It can't end this way. We've been too good of friends to just ignore each other.

I act decisively and sit down next to him. He turns to me startled.

"I'm sorry Adam," I tell him sincerely.

He looks at me for a long time before responding, "It's alright."

I look at him surprised.

He continues, "I thought about things last night. You didn't know the full story and were trying to make sense of things. I didn't help by shutting you out."

Without thinking I lean over and give him a hug. Adam laughs.

"I said it's alright," he repeats as we pull away.

I shake my head. "I made some assumptions I never should have made. We crossed the line."

Adam's face darkens a little. "Sure, I was offended but Clare, you didn't know."

After a small silence I dare to ask about Eli. "What about Eli?"

Adam frowns. "The things he said… I can't forgive that so easily."

"He didn't mean it—"

"Can we not talk about it, right now?" he interrupts. I nod. He continues, "If we're going to be friends then I need you to respect that Eli and I will have to sort out our issues on our own."

Adam is totally right. I'm so busy defending my boyfriend that I'm alienating him. "Okay. I will," I tell him.

After a moment Adam gives me a small smile. "Good, because I could really use a friend right now," he admits.

I smile back at him. "Adam, are you ok?" I ask after a long moment. I don't mean to pry, but I really don't understand what happened the past few days.

He sighs. "You mean did I fall down and bump my head?" It's good to hear him joking again. It's familiar. He begins to tell me what happened with Bianca, while sparing me the details.

**Adam's POV –**

"So that's why you guys are partners?" Clare asks. With all I've told her, I'm pretty sure I just blew her mind.

I nod. "Yeah, being dancing partners makes things way easier than being randomly seen together," I admit. "Though we have fun dancing together."

"Eli's going to freak," Clare laughs. My smile falters a little. Seeing this she adds, "If you decide to tell him."

I sigh. I guess we'll make up eventually. Right now I rather not think about it.

"So other than me, who knows about this?" she asks changing the subject. I am happy to oblige her.

"Um, just you," I reply.

She looks at me stunned.

"I'm pretty sure Bianca hasn't told anyone. And Drew still doesn't know," I continue.

"When are you going to tell him?" she presses.

Inwardly I cringe. I don't like the fact that the girl I slept with previously went down on my brother. It grosses me out to be honest. I don't think it's something brothers should share.

"I don't know. You guys freaked out because of Bianca. Can you imagine what his reaction would be?" I question a little freaked.

She frowns, "Right."

More students start to pile into the school. It's close to homeroom.

"I'm sorry I made you miss your meeting," I tell her.

She looks at me with a heartfelt smile. "There was no place else I'd rather be."

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: Thanks for the reviews and subscriptions! Will post more soon… More Badam coming up in the next chapter!

On another note, I can't believe it's Thursday. Tomorrow Degrassi returns! I am so excited. Feels like it's been forever!


	9. Two Steps Back

"Can't Stop" – Part 9

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

9 –

**Bianca's POV –**

I'm waiting in the dance studio for Remedial Gym to begin. Most of the class has arrived but students are still trickling in. Adam hasn't arrived yet. I keep my eyes facing forward, pretending not to care.

"Hey Bianca," I hear.

I turn and to my surprise I see Kelby Jennings smiling at me. I'm annoyed because I know she always has an agenda.

"How's the project coming along with Adam?" she asks sweetly.

I resist rolling my eyes and instead shrug my shoulders.

"I saw you guys practicing the other day. You looked pretty good," she says.

My pulse quickens. '_What did she see?_' I wonder. I keep my mask tightly concealed, thoroughly hiding my panic at her words.

"I'm not about to get failing marks for dance," I boast. "Doesn't matter who my partner is," I add dismissively.

"That's great!" she exclaims. "Would you be interested in switching again? I just don't gel with my new partner."

I give her look, this time showing my annoyance. This chick has some nerve. Earlier this week she was horrified at the thought of dancing with Adam. Now that she sees he's a good dancer she's trying to poach him.

"We already have a routine," I tell her. She nods and slinks away. I shake my head but take note to be more careful of how I act around Adam.

"Hmm, that's news to me," Adam says with smirk.

I'm startled to see him standing beside me. I didn't notice when he came in. I struggle to keep my expression neutral, but a small smile appears on my lips.

"If you want to dance with her, I'll call her back over," I tease and feign walking away.

He laughs, "No. I prefer _our_ routine." My heart flutters a bit at his words and I look away from him.

"Positions everyone!" our instructor calls and so begins another day.

I feel Adam's eyes on me as we dance. I am still uneasy about yesterday while he comes across calm and collected. It's annoying that he seems fine while my world has been disrupted. I don't find the same comfort in the things I used to do and I'm not sure what to make of us.

Fifteen minutes in our instructor has us return to the bleachers. I am not paying attention as he talks of our final project and executing steps with precision. I'm not worried about that. I've been dancing since I was a little girl. I could do this in my sleep. Most of the time that's a major plus. On days like today it's a drawback because it allows my mind to wander.

**Adam's POV –**

Bianca's been really distant today. I'm not sure why but the energy between us seems off.

'_Is she mad at me?_' I wonder. I glance at her quickly. Our eyes meet briefly and she raises an eyebrow. I smile. Perhaps it's all in my head.

"I've been watching you all closely and most of you have a lot to learn. Fortunately there are a few promising pairs," our instructor continues. "I'm going to have them demonstrate how you will be expected to perform in the final piece. Take note of the rhythm and teamwork displayed."

He locks his eyes on me and Bianca. "You two have done well today. I'd like you dance what was choreographed in the last class."

I share a look with Bianca. She smirks at me and then heads to the floor. I follow.

In truth, I am nervous to dance with so many eyes on us. I'm convinced I'm going to miss a step or stumble if I look into her eyes. Up until now dancing has been our thing. It sparked our initial attraction. It centered us after we crossed the line. I'm not sure I want to share part of our connection with everyone else. However, it's not up to me.

I take her hand in mine and we move into the now familiar starting positions. I look at her with a hint of uncertainty and to my surprise she holds my gaze. I see her expression soften and can see apprehension in her eyes as well. She gives me a small smile as her expression changes to one of resolve. I match her mood and we begin to dance.

We both focus on the steps, ignoring our close proximity and body heat. I file it away to replay later. For now we're determined to prove ourselves. When it's over our class cheers. They're usually a disinterested bunch so their response feels good. I look over at Bianca and see that she is genuinely happy too. I realize what I should have noticed awhile ago. When we're just ourselves we make a pretty good team.

**Bianca's POV –**

We were awesome today. By far, the best pair in there. Adam and I had talked excitedly as I walked to my locker. We made plans to practice today after school and I'm elated. Things worked out better than I hoped.

As I slam my locker shut I hear an angry voice.

"What are you playing at?" Drew Torres asks me. I haven't spoken to him since Vegas Night. I immediately deduce this is about Adam. I roll my eyes.

"Excuse me?" I say annoyed.

"If you're trying to hurt my brother again I swear you'll regret it," he threatens.

He is so off base about Adam and me that it's funny. Making out and getting off together doesn't count as hurting him.

"Look, the overprotective brother act is cute, but not necessary," I dismiss him coolly. He glares at me in response. "Adam and I are dance partners, okay?"

I wish I hadn't closed my locker so I could slam it and then walk away.

Instead Drew moves closer to me. "Listen, Adam may be alright with giving you a second chance but I'm not. He's trusting to a fault sometimes, but I know your true colors. There's nothing I wouldn't do for my brother and if that means making your life a living hell I'll happily do that."

I am taken aback by the venom in his voice. "Are you done?" I quip sounding unfazed.

He stares at me for a long moment. Sensing in opening I zero in with a comeback. "I've got friends who would love to make _your _life a living hell. You don't want to go there. Don't take me on," I sneer at him. I leave him standing there as I head to my next class.

"Bitch," I hear him mutter.

.

tbc


	10. Drive

"Can't Stop" – Part 10

Summary and notes in part 1.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

10-

**Bianca's POV –**

In my next class I find myself ruminating about my argument with Drew. As much as I can't stand him, I get where he's coming from.

He has no reason to trust me. I was the one who outed Adam to the whole school. For months I've been mean to his brother. And, while entirely his fault, our tryst in the boiler room led to his break up with his girlfriend. I get why Drew hates me. Still, I can't let the guy push me around.

**Eli's POV –**

I watch him on the lunch line. Adam picks up a plain milk and then hands two more to the girls next to him. He is such a flirt. '_Being with Bianca hasn't changed that_,' I think. I mentally cringe at the thought. I don't what the deal is between them. For all I know it was just a fleeting thing. I hope.

Adam hands the lunch lady three dollars in coins. I smile. He always has an excess of coins. He's the guy who uses a five dollar bill to pay for a pack of gum. He makes his way towards the tables and I spring into action knowing this may be my only chance to intercept him.

"Adam!" I call out. He looks in my direction, startled by my sudden appearance.

"What do you want?" he says with little patience.

"Can we talk? Please," I plead with sincerity.

He looks at me for a long moment.

"The clocks running while your food is getting cold," I quip.

"Ha! That's tricky. Heat doesn't improve the quality of this monstrosity," he jokes. My spirits rise a little.

"Would you like to sit outside?" I press.

Adam nods. "Fine."

We walk to our usually table which is empty. I am thankful for once that Clare has yearbook today. We need to talk alone.

He grabs his fork and knife, and pauses to study his food. "These green beans are more of a brownish color," he notes.

I smile. He begins to eat and we sit in silence for awhile. It's not horribly awkward, as we use the time to examine our thoughts. Several minutes later I speak.

"Adam, I am so sorry," I say honestly.

He continues looking at his plate. "I've been hearing a lot of that today."

"I shouldn't have said what I did," I continue. "I know you're a guy, Adam. I'm just not sure if Bianca really understands that."

He grimaces. "Maybe you should stop worrying about what you _think_ Bianca knows."

I look away and nod. "You're right."

This time the long pause is tense. "I'm sorry for being so judgmental. I was a jerk yesterday."

Adam nods in agreement.

"I don't know anything about you and Bianca. I don't get it and I don't particularly like her." I know I'm treading on light ground. I continue, "But you're my friend and I've got your back."

"Do you?" he questions.

I blink. I'm doing all I can to apologize and it doesn't seem to be helping.

"I do Adam. I know I had a funny way of showing it, but you're my best friend. I'm sorrier than you can ever know that I hurt you," I tell him.

Adam sighs. "You could be a real idiot sometimes."

I recognize amusement in his tone, and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. Maybe we'll be okay.

"So where's your lunch?" he asks.

I shrug. "I had a big breakfast." I didn't want to risk missing my chance to catch up with Adam so I didn't go on the line.

Adam sees right through the lie and hands me his roll.

"So, did you mean what you said yesterday?" I ask after some time has passed.

Adam gives me a quizzical look at first, and then picks up on my meaning. "Yeah," he confirms.

"Wow, that's pretty major," I respond. I was shocked when Clare told me about the kiss. Adam's revelation that he and Bianca went much further than that threw me for a loop yesterday.

Adam nods in agreement. "It's been messing with my head," he admits.

"How so? This is a good thing, no?" I question.

He laughs. "Of course! But it's not something I want to think about in Math class. Or gym for that matter," he explains.

This makes me laugh as well. "Well, yeah. You've got to rein it in grasshopper."

He gives me a look. "I'm trying."

"Take more cold showers," I joke. The tension between us is gone and we're back to being buds.

**Adam's POV –**

We're sitting in Bianca's car. We decided to skip practice in favor of more mutually satisfying pursuits. After spending twenty minutes in the storage room we decided Bianca's bedroom was much more preferable. I am waiting her for to place the car into drive, but instead I find her looking at me.

"Maybe it's time for ground rules?" she suggests.

My heart is pounding in my chest. "I think that's a good idea," I hear myself say.

"This stays between us. No strings attached," she tells me.

I nod. "Okay."

"I don't need to tell you, if this gets out I'll deny," she continues.

I laugh. "I doubt anyone would believe me," I reason.

She brings her eyes to mine and slowly smiles. "Let's just see where this goes," she says softly. I'm not sure if she talking to me or saying it to herself. I can see the desire in her eyes, which mirrors my own. Emboldened I lean toward her and bring my lips to hers. Our kiss grows in intensity and after a moment I pull away.

"Drive," I say forcefully. Her eyes feign a challenge for a moment, and then she starts the engine.

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: Okay, there's smut up ahead in the next chapter. Just putting that out there. (skip to Adam's POV to read the tamer part)

Also, unfortunately I'm falling a bit behind in this story. I'm working on chapter 12 now, so updates may come a little slower. Doesn't help that this week has been really busy at work. Sigh. I have ideas for additional chapters, *hopefully* I can write some more this weekend.


	11. Highs and Lows

"Can't Stop" – Part 11

Summary in part 1.

Author's Note: This chapter is officially smut. No way around that! It's way more graphic than in the previous story. It was quite a challenge to write this in first person, but I think it turned out alright.

Rating: **Definitely M ****(skip to Adam's POV for the tamer part)**

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (This scene would definitely be on the cutting room floor!)

* * *

-oOo-

**Bianca's POV –**

I close my eyes as our kiss intensifies. My tongue battles his as he invades my mouth. Heat courses through my body and I pull him closer as his hands continue to wander. We've been hooking up for the past two weeks. There is no ambiguity about what we're doing anymore. We're nearly naked in my bed in full light. I'm on fire as Adam reaches to discard my underwear and I help him pull off his.

Within seconds his hands are on me, caressing my most sensitive spot. I let out a moan and look into his eyes, which are intense and full of need. I keep my eyes locked on his as I begin to stroke him. He crashes his lips on mine. We kiss deeply while increasing our pleasure with quick movements. For now there is nothing beyond the feel of him, his touches, and this burning desire.

Suddenly Adam breaks off our kiss. I look at him confused by the action.

"I want… to taste you," he says. I am momentarily dazed by the heat present in his eyes. When I don't respond he sweeps his gaze over my body.

"Oh," I blush. I feel a little silly. Despite my amble experience going down on guys I have very little in reverse. All of two times to be exact. Both were nothing to phone home about.

I look at him and nod. My pulse quickens as he kisses his way south. I am overflowing with anticipation by the time he reaches my thighs. He looks up at me with a wicked grin. He then winks which causes me to relax. He's fully in control and it's sexy as hell. Gently he parts my legs and turns his attention to the task at hand.

All rational thought ceases the moment his tongue makes contact. He starts out almost torturously slow, taking long leisurely strokes. I cry out with pleasure and it isn't long before I'm panting for more. He quickens his pace and alternates between light touches and swirling his tongue.

"Adam," I moan as I run my hands through his hair. I can feel him smile against me.

The waves of pleasure that I feel begin to blend together and I know I'm close. He seems to sense this and speeds up his movements. I push back rapidly on him as this feeling intensifies. My body tingles wildly as a feeling of euphoria approaches.

**Adam's POV –**

I lie there panting for several moments while I regain my bearings. Words cannot adequately describe what I've just experienced. I've wanted to taste her there for awhile but today I finally worked up the courage to go for it. I'm ecstatic that I did. Making her writhe with pleasure with just my tongue was _hot_. I couldn't help but touch myself, so I'm spent as well.

Slowly I pull myself up and take my place beside her. She is still breathing heavily as she opens her eyes. I smile at her and draw her close, with my arms around her. I move forward, wanting to kiss her but pause realizing it might be better to clean up first.

She surprises me by closing the distance between us and kissing me fully on lips. She makes a small sound, I presume at unfamiliar taste of herself. I laugh and she pulls away.

"That's why I paused," I tell her amused.

She shakes her head but I can tell she's not really upset. I pull her close and we snuggle under the covers.

The last couple of weeks have been awesome. Our dance routine is coming along great and we interact in school pretty regularly. We continue hook up after school about three times a week and no one suspects a thing. I still haven't told Drew and for now I have no plans to. I would like to say Eli and Clare have been understanding, but in truth they know bringing up my trysts with Bianca is a loaded subject.

As for Bianca and I, we're taking it as it comes. We're both enjoying our arrangement and we both prefer to keep it secret. No harm, no foul.

Sometime later Bianca shakes me awake.

"Hey, it's getting late," she tells me. To my disappointment she has a t-shirt on and I wonder how much time has passed. I glance at the clock and immediately sit up. I need to get going soon so that I'm not late to dinner.

She smiles at my bewildered expression. I begin to leave the bed in search of the rest of my clothes when she stops me. "That was amazing," she says simply.

I feel warm all over and smile broadly. I look into her eyes and nod, not quite trusting myself with words.

"You know, you should probably clean up more than usual," she notes. "Or else I'm pretty sure you'll smell like me," she adds with a hint of amusement.

"Good point," I laugh.

She moves closer to me and places my arms around her, "Hmm, we should take a shower."

I smile. A quick shower is probably a good idea. "Yeah, I probably should. You cool with that?"

She kisses me and I get her meaning. Immediately I feel like a bucket of ice cold water has been dumped on me. I feel a strong sense of dread as I recognize the emotion and struggle to hide my inner turmoil.

I pull away. "Um, I don't think I have time," I tell her. I raise my eyes to hers and force a smile on my face. "Another time?"

She blinks then quickly says, "Sure."

I grab my clothes and head towards the bathroom. After closing the door I place my head in my hands. I don't want to feel this here. Yet, my mood is already shifting and I know fighting it is useless.

_Dysphoria._

Occasionally I experience intense feelings of sadness and depression about being born in the wrong body. Most of the time I deal with it fine, but there are times when it's too much. The most mundane events can trigger it. These moods come on suddenly — you know in your head that it's temporary and the future holds better days. But you don't feel it. Hope dwindles and soon the sadness consumes you.

Drew has seen me at my worst. He does his best to cheer me up. I'm not afraid to be vulnerable in front of him – we've been through too much. The idea of Bianca seeing me when I'm not myself is frightening.

I dress quickly and hastily wash my face. I gurgle mouthwash four times and fix my hair.

**Bianca's POV –**

He smiles as he says goodbye and gives me a quick kiss. I close the door and frown. '_That was weird_,' I think.

Adam couldn't leave fast enough and I'm not sure why. The afternoon went pretty well. Incredible actually. I'm confused as to what changed.

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: I forewarned of smut and there you have it. However, I can't seem to write it without a side of angst. In particular, I wanted tackle the issue of body dysphoria.

Thanks for all the reviews, subscription, and faves. It really motivated me to push through. I was stuck on chapter 12 for the longest time. This has been the busiest week ever at work but I managed to finish it the other night! So, I'm posting this one (which kicks off a new arc). In truth, I'm a little nervous about it, but either you're true to the story or not. Let me know what you think!


	12. Honesty

"Can't Stop" – Part 12

Summary and notes in part 1.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I was nervous about posting the last part because it was the most intense scene like that I've posted so far. Glad it was well received!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian...)

* * *

12-

**Adam's POV –**

I watch her from across the lunch room. She's sitting with Owen and Fitz. They're talking excitedly and laughing as people walk by. She's seemingly lost in thought as she studies the food on her tray. I wonder what she's thinking about. I wonder if she feels the way I do about the past few days. The thought makes me feel guilty, yet slightly hopeful…

Bianca suddenly looks up. She smiles at her friends before delivering a remark that makes them all laugh. I look away.

Right.

Why would Bianca be thinking about me? We had a really good situation for awhile, and right when things were going great I screwed it up. '_Typical_,' I think bitterly. I should be used to disappointment by now.

The last time we together ended on a bad note for me. I had a dysphoric moment and I was worried she'd see right through me. So I left. Quickly. The mood passed but the next day I was bit embarrassed. I've been avoiding her. Not technically. We still have class together. We're still dance partners. But I've avoided being alone with her and after a few days… well, I think whatever arrangement we had might be over. She hasn't even mentioned it.

I get that no strings attached means that when things are done, they're done. I just didn't want it to end so soon and I don't know how to fix it.

**Eli's POV –**

He's watching her again with a somewhat wistful look in his eyes.

It might make me a bad friend to admit this, but I feel a spark of hope that he's been avoiding her. Adam won't admit that much, but I can tell there's some distance there. The past two weeks I idly wondered if my best friend had a lobotomy. It's been kind of strange to watch them interact. Seeing Adam and Bianca talking in the halls went from being head scratching to quite normal.

"Adam, is everything alright?" I hear Clare ask. Inwardly I cringe. Why does she have address the elephant in the room? Just let it fade.

He tears his eyes away from Bianca and smiles. It's forced. "Yeah. Why?"

I'm grateful he gives nothing away but Clare isn't so easily deterred.

"It just seems like something is up between the two of you," she presses.

Adam's smile falters a little and I can tell he's weighing whether or not to confide in us. I feel a little guilty because I know he can't talk to Drew about this. I finally decided to throw in my support.

"Yeah, I know you guys are still practicing in and all, but yesterday you actually met us at the Dot afterwards!" I add. We've gotten use to not seeing him on days he has dance practice.

Adam chuckles. "True," he pauses and takes a more somber stance. "Well… it's kind of hard to talk about."

I don't like his expression. "I've got time."

Clare is more hesitant. "Um, well I don't want to hear any… details."

Adam and I share a look before we burst out laughing. She is not amused. Adam hasn't been explicit in any of his tales, at least when Clare's around, so we find it funny.

"I promise I won't traumatize you," he teases. After a moment he shifts back into serious mode. "The other day we were hanging out," he begins.

I shoot Clare an amused look and she frowns.

"And I suddenly felt this sadness," he continues. My smile slides off my face at this turn of conversation. I am humbled by his honesty.

"Adam," Clare says sympathetically. "What brought this on?"

He shrugs. "It was something minor. I feel down from time to time. I mean, it never lasts long."

I nod understanding the feeling. I battled depression after Julia died. Adam and I have talked about dealing with depressive moods in the past.

"What were you feeling down about?" Clare asks confused.

"Being born in the wrong body," he answers simply.

"Oh," Clare says. I figured as much, but I can tell she's at lost with what to say next. There are no easy feel good statements to soften things you can't change. That's why it's easier to lie and say you're 'fine' than it is to admit that you're not.

I smirk at Adam. "That sucks."

He raises and eyebrow and nods.

"So what happened with Bianca?" I ask moving things along.

"Well, like I said, it never lasts long. I feel much better now," he explains. "But I kind of left awkwardly the other day. I haven't been avoiding her per se but I still feel a little weird."

"Like she can see right through you?" I ask knowingly.

He smiles. "Yeah."

I've been there. It sucks when people you don't want to see you vulnerable do. However, from what he says it seems like it's all in his head.

"Trust me, she can't. I think you're over thinking it," I tell him.

Adam laughs. "Hmm, you think so?" he teases.

Clare looks from him to me and shakes her head amused.

**Clare's POV –**

'_There's a reason they're best friends_,' I think to myself. They get each other. In no time the conversation slides along to upcoming movies. I'm not really looking forward to seeing Ong Bak 3. Eli talked me into watching the first one and I found it too violent.

Lunch continues and sometime later I catch Adam staring across the room at Bianca. And surprise, surprise this time she's looking back… Okay, not really. It's been quite a common occurrence over the past two weeks. What I'm actually surprised about is that no one has caught on. I mean, their looks have two variations.

There's the teasing exchange which comes off as, "Hey, I'm looking at you too". It's benign amusement, really. Then there are the lustful looks which communicate, "Can't wait to meet up again" or "Thinking about last time". These are glaringly obvious to us, yet raise no suspicions. I don't get it.

Anytime I'm in Bianca's line of sight she glares at me. She hasn't been any nicer to Eli either. I really don't understand what Adam sees in her. Fine, I can see that guys find her "hot", but she isn't a nice person. She reminds me of the nurse from that movie "Shallow Hal".

I laugh aloud causing the boys to look at me.

"What's so funny?" Eli says interested. Adam raises an eyebrow at me.

I smile and take a long sip of my water.

.

tbc


	13. Uncertainty

"Can't Stop" – Part 13

Summary and additional notes in part 1.

Author's Note: Sorry that so much time has passed since the last update! I really appreciate the interest in this story. It helped me to push through and the next two chapters have been completed. There will be an update this week!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

13-

**Bianca's POV –**

I'm no stranger to the cycle of hook ups. After awhile someone loses interest and they start to pull away. It's the nature of the beast and when it's over there's no skin off my back. Usually I have someone else in my line of sight anyway. But the past few days have left me confused. I keep feeling a push-pull vibe from Adam and I can't figure it out.

Whenever he looks at me from across the room, I can feel his eyes on me before looking up. Clearly the attraction is still there but we haven't hooked up at all this week. We've had dance practice but there's a distance I can't explain. I'm mad at myself for even caring.

I keep thinking about the last time we hooked up. The heat between us. The need and desire in his eyes. The skillful movements of his tongue. I had never been so turned on in my life! I remember questioning why we didn't do that sooner, and was looking forward to doing it again. Then… Nothing. Out of nowhere a wall appeared. I wondered what caused things to change.

"Hey Bee," I hear.

I look up to see Fitz waving a hand in front my face amused. "What?" I ask annoyed.

He and Owen laugh. "Don't bite my head off. You were at the Ravine yesterday. You gotta admit that girl Haley seemed into me."

I crack a smile. For all their posturing as tough guys, Fitz and Owen love to rib each other about their hit or miss record with girls. Fleeting hook ups are common for them, but sustained interest is few and far between. When they find a girl they like all bets are off and the teasing begins.

"You're bringing Bee into this? Now I know you're making things up. She has hardly been around lately," Owen retorts.

I send him a pointed look, but there's truth to his words. These past two weeks I hung out at the Ravine maybe twice and I've bailed on a few parties to hook up with Adam.

Fitz grinned. "Bee, where have you been?" he teases in a sing-song voice. "I'd look for you in the boiler room but I heard you haven't been there lately."

Okay. Getting a little too close to home. I shake my head. "Owen, don't believe him," I start. "That Haley girl was busy with that football guy."

"Oooh!" Owen shouts amused. "You got schooled!"

I laugh as Fitz frowns at him and begins his rebuttal. Suddenly my phone beeps. I furrow my brows when I realize it's a message from Adam. I haven't heard from him lately and I certainly didn't want to come across needy by reaching out to him. '_Maybe he's texting to cancel tomorrow's practice_,' I think bitterly. Then again, why should I care?

_**Want 2 hang out l8r? – Adam T**_

I raise an eyebrow. This is unexpected.

"Hmm, I know that look. What do you have there, Bee?" Fitz smirks at me.

I snap my phone shut and give a noncommittal shrug.

"Yeah, are we still hanging out later?" Owen asks.

"Can't," I tell him.

"Whoever he is can wait," he says with a smirk.

I shake my head. "It's not like that."

Owen studies me for a moment. "Please don't tell me you're hanging out with the Torres kid again?"

"Hey now, Bee likes dance and she's good at it," Fitz defends me. I stick my tongue out at Owen. He continues, "Don't hate on Torres because he gets to feel up a girl more regularly than you do!"

I laughed heartily. If they only knew…

"Good one," Owen says pretending to be hurt. "You spend all day thinking of it?"

"It was worth it," he shoots back.

I stand off to the side and open my phone.

**Adam's POV –**

I'm half expecting not to hear back from Bianca but after my talk with Eli I decided to just man up and go for it. The worst that could happen is that she says no. The best that could up happen… well, that involves clothes coming off.

It's weird. Up until two weeks ago I've gone my whole life without having sex. Now just a few days without it feels like torture. Or maybe it's not knowing. If I knew our arrangement still stood I wouldn't be worrying about whether I'd ever hear her moan my name again. I'd be able to focus on my History lecture like I need to in order to pass the quiz tomorrow. No, instead I'm preoccupied with waiting for my phone to vibrate.

It's a little sad. I idly wonder what happened to "no strings attached" when I get a new text. It's her. I open my phone under the desk, out of sight.

_**That depends. What 4? – Bianca**_

I sit back in my seat as I try to decipher her meaning. Does that mean she wants to know if we're dancing? Or something else? After a few moments I decide to be bold.

**Bianca's POV –**

I'm not sure where things stand with Adam. Maybe I shouldn't care, but for some reason I do which why I can't help but grin at his response.

_** Just you – Adam T.**_

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: Hmm, will Adam's theory prove correct? What do you think? :D


	14. Hooking Up

"Can't Stop" – Part 14

Summary and additional notes in part 1.

A/N: Yay, updating this week like I promised! Writing this chapter worked out kind of interesting, because I went back a revised the opening quite a bit. Originally I paraphrased it, but ended up expanding it yesterday (and it shows.. cleaned up a few typos..)

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

14-

**Adam's POV –**

I am waiting by Bianca's locker. I didn't intend to be the first one here. She's late. I wanted to make a suave entrance, like I couldn't be concerned in the least about what's going to happen between us. I stayed in the classroom reading comics for an additional seven minutes. I expected to find her here, but the hallway is deserted. Even the last of the stragglers have left. Maybe she changed her mind?

I sigh. Clare was annoyed with me when I told her I had plans after school. In our last class of the day together, social studies, she asked me if I wanted to go to a book signing with her and Eli.

"_You're meeting with Bianca?" Clare said surprised. Her words came out rather loud._

_I glanced around alarmed. Luckily no one seemed to be listening in. I gave her a pointed look. "Yeah."_

"_You move fast," she noted. I smiled. "Don't you have practice tomorrow? Isn't this a little too much?"_

"_It can't ever be too much," I smirked. Hooking up with Bianca everyday would be fine with me._

_Catching my double meaning Clare made a face. "Ew."_

"_You asked!" I shrugged._

Standing here at her locker I don't regret making plans to meet up, but I am nervous. What if she demands to know why I've been so hot and cold?

**Bianca's POV –**

He continues to drone on and on. I glance at the clock getting increasingly annoyed. Just my luck really. The faculty chaperone for detention rotates every two weeks. Today is the first day of Mr. Garrety's shift. He's telling me about assignments I need to make up for Physics. I'm pretending to listen.

"You just need to apply yourself," he finishes.

I look at him and nod. I would if I cared, but who uses physics after they graduate? I'm certainly not going to become a Physicist.

"Alright. See you tomorrow Miss DeSousa," he says and begins to organize the files on his desk. I quickly leave the room.

As I walk down the walk I have one thought, '_I have to get out of here!_' The day has been too long. Of course I had to be one of three students Mr. Garrety pulled aside after detention. It wouldn't have been so annoying if he started with me first, but nope. Here I am still at Degrassi, fifteen minutes past four. I am quite late to meet Adam.

I see him when I round the corner. He's leaning against my locker and looks bored out of his mind, which makes me smile. He looks how I feel.

"Let's get out of here," I tell him without breaking my stride.

He looks at me startled. I tilt my head towards the exit and he follows. When we pass through the double doors I let out a laugh. I'm finally free and it feels good. I don't care that it's rather chilly and the sky is overcast. I don't feel closed in anymore. I am no longer defined by assumptions or preset judgments of who I am.

I quickly unlock my car. I slide into the driver side and open the locks for Adam. Once we're inside I immediately turn on the heater. I bring my hands to my face and blow on them, trying to warm them up. Apparently freedom has its price. I should have gotten my gloves from my locker.

To my surprise Adam reaches towards me and takes my hands in his. I sigh as I feel the warmth of his skin. I look up and my eyes find his. We look at each other for a long moment. His eyes hold an intensity that I can't quite describe. I watch as he leans forward. I meet him halfway and suddenly we're kissing.

**Adam's POV –**

Bianca and I don't seem to do things halfway. So when we begin kissing, we're _really_ kissing. Intense, firing on all cylinders kind of kissing. Our tongues alternate between fighting each other and exploring the enclosed space of our mouths. Her hands are in my hair. My hands go from grabbing her waist to sliding up her chest. I'm sure what prompts it, but eventually we realize the school parking lot is not the most discreet place for a secret hook up.

Upon finally pulling apart we're breathless. The car is certainly warmed up enough so she places it into drive.

"Do you think anyone saw us?" I ask several minutes later at a red light.

Bianca shrugs. "If they did, they probably didn't see our faces."

This makes both of us laugh.

'_What was that?_' I think. We barely said two words to each out before making out, but by the time we're back at her place I couldn't care in the slightest.

**Bianca's POV –**

It's official. Kissing Adam Torres is addictive. When we reach my room I slam him against my door as we begin furtively kissing. He wastes no time pulling at my clothes. By the time we fall on the bed I'm on fire and want to get off. I am literally dripping with anticipation when he climbs on top of me and hungrily recaptures my mouth.

Once again, his hands are everywhere. I feel him run up and down by body, and pay extra attention to my breasts. I reach for him down below and he moans. Feeling him wet and aroused, I continue stroke him. He deepens our kiss. After a long moment he pulls away.

I look at him confused. He gives me a self assured grin.

"Lie back," he demands.

**Adam's POV –**

Her hands on me felt amazing but I was beginning to feel a little _too_ good. I want this to last and I have a few things in mind. I can't help but smirk as she follows my order to lie down. This is Bianca. She's usually all attitude and stubborn as hell but she responds the authority in my voice. She's sexy as hell, even more so when she follows my lead.

I take in the sight of her naked body and it's hard to show restraint but I manage. As much as I want to kiss her again – I could get lost in that for hours – I decide to focus on kissing her body. I start with her breasts, and then move downwards to her stomach. Her breathing has quickened and I can tell she's anxious to feel my tongue caress her most sensitive spot, but it's too soon for that. I take my time kissing down her waist and thighs before pulling back and separating her thighs.

I bring my eyes to hers. They are full of need. I wink at her and she smiles. I keep eye contact as I brush my fingers lightly against her.

-oOo-

**Adam's POV –**

I had an idea and I followed it through. I thought by the end she would be happy and she was beyond measure. I could tell she was close a few times, but I pulled back. I wanted it to be intense. My way of making up for being so weird this week. We kissed, touched, stroked in various positions. When I heard her scream my name as she climaxed I knew it was worth it.

"So, you really don't mind?" I ask her. We are lying tangled in the covers of her bed, worn out but content.

Bianca shakes her head. "Well, it's not my favorite thing, but I like kissing you more."

I grin at her. "Bianca DeSousa likes kissing me," I tease.

She throws me an annoyed look. "You just figured that out?"

I laugh and look at her with a sense of wonder. I assumed kissing her after oral was a no-go, but she just told me she didn't mind. The more I get to know her, the more she surprises me. Like earlier, she was exhausted after I got her off but she insisted on helping me finish anyway. As hostile as she was towards me after learning I am transgendered, I'm surprised this exchange isn't more one-sided. I realize we're really in this together.

**Bianca's POV –**

I catch myself looking into his eyes, and I look away. '_What am I doing?_' I ask myself. Sure, it's Adam but I shouldn't let my guard down so easily. This is only temporary so why do I feel so comfortable lying here?

"I like kissing you too," he says cutting through the short silence. Something about the way he says it makes me feel tingly inside. I prepare to change the topic with a cutting remark but he speaks again.

"And of course, doing this."

He reaches out and runs his hand over my right breast. He gently caresses the skin and my heart beat speeds up. I watch as he leans over and takes my nipple into his mouth. I whimper as he flicks his tongue over the top. He lightly sucks for a moment and then pulls away.

"Want to go again?" he whispers, leaning in close to me.

I'm not sure if I can form full thoughts right now. That is the sexiest seduction I've ever experienced. I look back at the boiler room and wonder how could I ever been satisfied by that? Sure, the power and control was an aphrodisiac all of its own, but that's present in my hook ups with Adam along with reciprocity. He makes sure I get off every time, sometimes more than once.

When I don't respond Adam begins kissing up my chest. I don't want to question it but I ask what I'm dying to know.

"Where do you get all this energy?"

**Adam's POV –**

I hear her question and laugh. Is it possible I've worn Bianca DeSousa out? I'm not usually this vigorous but the past few days were a bit rough.

"You're hot," I answer between kisses. She giggles and pulls me up.

We're kissing again, deeply. I'm exploring every inch of her mouth while my hands are lost in her hair. Heat courses through me and I wish I could do this forever. I am lost in the moment when suddenly a voice causes us to pull apart.

**Bianca's POV –**

"Hey, Bee are you in here?"

Shit. That sounds like… I stop kissing Adam and look over his shoulder. Sure enough, my cousin Jason is standing in the door wide eyed.

"Jase, what the hell?" I snap at him.

He raises his hands apologetically and mumbles sorry as he closes the door.

I pull away from Adam and lay flat on my back. I cover my face with my hands, as my mind races. What did he see? We're tangled in covers but I'm obviously topless. Adam is wearing a t-shirt but I'm not sure if he could tell about him.

"Bianca, are you alright?" Adam asks softly. I can detect the concern in his tone.

I nod my head. "Yeah, just give me a moment."

I feel his weight shift on the bed as he sits up and begins fishing for the rest of his clothes.

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: A lot happened in this nice and long chapter :D Let me know what you think!

FYI, this story is up to 39 pages in Word and I am nowhere near the end, lol!


	15. Name

"Can't Stop" – Part 15

Summary and additional notes in part 1.

A/N: Happy Turkey day tomorrow, American readers :D Happy Thursday to everyone, lol.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

15-

**Adam's POV –**

'_So much for keeping things simple_,' I think as I button up my shirt. I'm nearly fully dressed when I locate Bianca's shirt and hand it to her.

"Thanks," she tells me. We continue to dress in silence. I still have no idea who that was or what this means for us. I'm nervous about what we'll face once we step out that door, but I know that Bianca doesn't owe me any explanations. When we're together, we're together. When we're not, we're not.

I glance over at her, somewhat wistfully. She is clearly lost in thought, but she still looks amazing. I'm tempted to reach out and grab her hand, or make a funny comment to see her smile. Instead, I give her space.

It suddenly occurs to me, what if this past week she was doing the same? Giving me space to work out my own issues? I quickly dismiss the thought. It's more likely that she didn't care. She's not invested in this, so I shouldn't be either. It's not smart to start caring when we're just hooking up.

"Are you ready?" she asks me. I look at her and smile.

"I was born ready." I'm not sure why I said that, but it was the first thing that came to mind. Bianca raises an eyebrow and gives me a look that screams 'that was lame'. I hold her gaze for a moment longer and then wink. This causes her to crack a smile.

"Okay, Romeo. Let's get going," she teases and opens the door.

I smile wider, elated that I was able to raise her spirits. Not sure why that makes me so happy.

**Bianca's POV –**

I breathe a sigh of relief when I close the front door. Adam just left. We didn't see Jason when we exited my room. I wonder if he is still around when I hear a noise from the kitchen.

I frown. Of course he would be in there! Feeling a bit of dread, I march over there ready to deflect any questions with anger.

"Hey Bee!" Jason says when he sees me enter the room. He is at the stove placing dry pasta into boiling water. "I could use a hand dicing the onions."

I glare at him, despite the fact that having pasta sounds really good about now. "What the fuck Jase? You don't knock?"

He looks at me with a lopsided grin. "My fault. Didn't think you were in there with boy," he tells me.

I roll my eyes. "I'm not thirteen anymore," I retort. He's been gone for so long how would he know anything about my life?

"I know. But from what I hear the Ravine is more your scene," he quips, giving me a knowing look.

"Whatever," I dismiss him. Jason used to run with a similar crowd when he lived here. He actually attended Degrassi for a year before getting kicked out.

He shrugs. "I didn't come back here after Juvie, but I've had my ear to the ground," he explains. "You and I are much more alike than you think."

I frown, unsure of what to make of that. Growing up as an only child, Jason was like my big brother. We were close. He started to get into trouble in his late teens and eventually did time in Juvenile Hall. Since being released his visits are sporadic at best.

"But I think you're much smarter than I was," Jason continues. "You know when to say when."

I look away from him. Needing something to do with my hands I grab a paring knife and begin dicing the onions. We work in a companionable silence for awhile.

"So how long are you going to be in town this time?" I ask.

"For a bit," he answers vaguely. I channel my annoyance into mixing the sauce.

"So who was that guy?"

I pause mid-stir. I had almost forgotten that he walked in on me and Adam. "Who?" I respond, hoping to sound unconcerned.

"The dude who had his tongue down your throat!" he laughs.

"Shut up!" I say annoyed.

"Really, I'm curious," he presses.

I take a deep breath and turn to him. "Why do you care?"

The grin slides off his face as he takes on a more serious expression. "Aunt Elena says you're not the boyfriend type. She thinks its better that you focus on your studies but you and I know the real reason you don't do relationships." He pauses. "Like me, you're a commitment phobe and I don't blame you since we don't have a history of anything working out in our family. If you're bringing a guy home that represents a bit of commitment, or am I reading too much into it?"

I stare at him for a moment. '_When did Jase get so insightful?_' I think to myself. For the record, I don't think I'm a commitment phobe. I just like to keep my options open. There's nothing wrong with not wanting to be tied down. My mind settles on Adam and I'm not sure how to answer. I can finally admit that I like him, but not enough to change radically change my life. I like how things are. It's simple and uncomplicated. Adam is anything but.

"You're reading too much into it," I say coolly.

Jason snorts. "It was a long shot but I just wanted to make sure."

"And why's that?" I don't get his sudden interest in my personal life.

"If some guy breaks your heart, I'll have to break his legs," he chuckles. "Seriously, Bee. You know I'll always look out for you."

I shrug. "Well, I can take care of myself."

"I know that, but I feel bad spending so much time away. I used to have your back." Jason sighs. "So, does this kid have a name?"

"Jase," I say in warning tone.

"Just in case I have to beat him up down the road?" he argues with smile.

We stare at each other for a moment. "Adam," I relent. "His name is Adam."

.

tbc

* * *

A/N: Shameless plug for my other fics, "Kiss, Kiss" and "Radiate". They have a Fiona/Adam/Bianca triangle...


	16. Options

"Can't Stop" – Part 16

Summary and additional notes in part 1.

Author's Note: I've been blown away by all the inquiries into this story! Thank you so much! Back by popular demand, here's a new chapter ;-)

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

16-

**Eli's POV –**

"So you have no idea who that guy was?" I ask him. Adam just told me how his hook up with Bianca yesterday went.

He shrugs. "Not, really."

I look at him confused. "Dude, why didn't you ask her?"

"Because we're just hooking up. It's no strings attached," he answers quickly. _Too_ _quickly_. I raise an eyebrow.

"It seems silly you share orgasms but sharing a detail about your life is too personal," I quip.

Adam shifts uncomfortable. "She didn't push me when I was acting weird—"

"Probably because she didn't care," I point out. Adam narrows his eyes at me. "Look, I don't pretend to understand your arrangement, but it seems a little empty."'

"Thanks Eli. I appreciate how non-judgmental you're being today," he says sarcastically and stands up.

"Wait!" I stand up too. "I don't mean it like that. You're a great guy Adam and it seems like you're selling yourself short. You deserve much more than these hook ups," I explain. Bianca doesn't even see him for who he is. If she did she wouldn't be just using him to get off.

-oOo-

**Adam's POV –**

My talk with Eli made me think about things. I was mad at him, but I had to admit he had a point. It _was_ kind of silly that I didn't feel comfortable asking Bianca who that random guy was. A few minutes earlier I was sucking on her nipple! Whatever there is between us is so confusing that sometimes I want to scream.

"Having a bad day?" I hear.

I didn't realize I was so obvious. Perhaps I could have been gentler with grabbing books from my locker. I turn around to see Fiona Coyne smiling at me. She's beautiful and whenever we talk I remind myself not to look at her too long. It's like staring into the sun.

"No, I was just annoyed with the general state of my locker," I tell her.

"You know, they have a remedy for that," she says lightly.

I grin at her. "Oh? And what's that?"

"It's called cleaning your locker," she teases.

We laugh.

"Fair enough. I guess I walked right into that one," I say as I close my locker.

She nods. "It's hard to resist when you make it so easy." There's a twinkle in her eye. "So, how have you been? I feel like I've barely seen you these past few weeks."

I shrug. I used to take every opportunity to be near her and chat. Since I started hooking up with Bianca I kind of fell off her radar. Or rather vice versa. "Good. I've been busy with projects."

"Right, I heard," she says as we walk down the hall.

I send her a quizzical look. "What have you heard?"

"You're working on a dance project with Bianca."

"Right," I say confused. How does she know that?

"Holly J wants to ask you guys to perform at the student showcase. She's already asked two other groups from your class," she tells me.

Ah, that makes sense. "Really?" I ask.

She gives me a conspiring grin. "Yeah, I heard you guys are pretty good. The best in the class even."

I raise both eyebrows and smirk. "Is that so?"

She laughs and nods. "Hmm, do I detect a big of smugness?"

I shrug. "I would never," I say innocently.

We reach her class and stop outside of the door. "Well, I'd like to see if it's true. Save me a dance sometime?"

We lock eyes for a moment and my pulse quickens. "Absolutely."

She grins and heads into her class. I stand there for a few seconds, processing our conversation. There seemed to be a bit of a vibe between us.

**Bianca's POV –**

The warning bell rings and Adam's not here yet. Most days he arrives before me.

'_Maybe he's avoiding me?_' I think. I frown at myself. We left on good terms yesterday despite Jase walking in on us, so why am I dwelling on negative thoughts?

Before I can ruminate further Adam enters the room right before the late bell rings. He looks a little frazzled and I smirk.

"Cutting it close Mr. Torres," our instructor Mr. Drayson notes. Adam gives him a curt nod and continues walking towards me. He takes the empty seat to my right.

"Looking to join me in detention for tardiness?" I tease.

"No," he says humorlessly and faces forward as Mr. Drayson takes attendance.

**Adam's POV –**

Perhaps I was a bit frosty at the beginning of class, but as we continue dancing my mood picks up. Holding her in my arms feels natural. I quickly remember why this is my favorite class. I get to be close to Bianca, grab her waist, and look into her eyes without raising any eyebrows. It's also amazing how many inside jokes we can convey to each other without speaking. I enjoy making her laugh and vice versa.

When class ends I feel a hint of disappointment, but then I realize finally have a chance to ask her about yesterday.

"Walk you to your locker?" I ask as I grab my book bag.

"Why not?" she says nonchalantly.

I see right through the act and smirk. I decide to test the waters.

**Bianca's POV –**

"So, how did yesterday go?" Adam asks.

We just left the dance studio and are en route to my locker.

"Pretty damn good until Jase walked in." I cringe thinking of that. I'm still pissed he just came in like that.

"Right," Adam says. After a pause he asks, "And who is Jase?"

I look at him for a moment and then laugh. I guess I was so preoccupied by the sudden interruption that I didn't tell Adam who he was! He throws me a quizzical look while waiting. "I'm not sure if the curly black hair gave him away, but he's my cousin."

"Oh," Adam responds.

"Growing up Jason was like my older brother. We're both only children," I continue. I realize this is the first time I spoke to him about my home life.

Adam smiles. "Me too! Before my mom remarried, that is," he clarifies. He adds with a faraway look, "It got lonely at times."

I nod with understanding.

"So... Is he going to be around?" he asks.

It only takes me a moment to realize what he's really asking. "You mean do we need a new spot to _practice_?" I tease.

He chuckles and shrugs.

I pause to think about it. "No. I'll make sure he won't be around."

.

tbc

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A/N: I was able to finish the ending this chapter last night. I'm working on the next chapter. It is really lengthy and I think you guys will enjoy what goes down.

Thanks for reading!

**Note: Chapter 17 is up. If you don't see the next button, you can select it from the menu in 1st chapter.**


	17. Breaking Bread

"Can't Stop" – Part 17

Summary and additional notes in part 1.

Author's Notes: Thanks for the reviews guys! I'm getting inspired to write even more! It's simply amazing because I was stuck for awhile. I'm really excited to post this chapter because it's one of my favorites.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

17-

**Adam's POV –**

We're laughing as we enter the Dot. I hold the door and wait for her to walk in first. She heads in and quickly grabs us a table. I glance around and am relieved that most of the after school crowd as dissipated. Perhaps this wasn't a bad idea after all. Across the room two familiar faces catch my eye. Eli and Clare stare at me with confused expressions. I gather they're not happy to see me here with Bianca. I debate whether to go over and talk for a moment, before deciding against it. I give them a small wave and follow Bianca to our table.

She has already removed her coat and placed it on the back of her chair. She looks up at me with an amused smile as I take a seat.

"Your friends don't like me much," she acknowledges.

I shrug and fold my hands on the table. They're cold from being outside. "Your friends don't like me either," I tell her. Fitz has been rather indifferent towards me as of late but Owen still glares at me with a predatory look.

"Touché," she laughs and runs a hand through her hair. "So, what does this free meal entail?"

"Anything on the menu," I grin.

She raises an eyebrow. "Anything?"

"Well, within reason," I clarify noting her mischievous look. My allowance affords only so much.

"Hmm, and here I was thinking you were a big spender," she teases.

I give her a look. "Are you going to order or not?"

"And now you're rushing me?" she protests.

"Can't win, can I?" I joke.

I watch as she studies the menu. Her actions surprise me. Most people have one or two things they always order from here. I notice that she slightly moves her lips as she reads and find it cute. She smiles to herself when she decides what she wants. I know I should probably look away but I don't. She looks up and we lock eyes. I can feel the mood shift and my stomach is doing flips. This feels like a date even though it isn't. I just know there's nowhere else I'd rather be.

**Bianca's POV –**

I find myself staring into Adam Torres' eyes. In the past when I looked into his eyes I saw hurt or disdain. Usually caused by an insult. These days I see other emotions. Desire. Lust. Amusement. Confusion. Defiance. Maybe even affection? I might be seeing what I want to see on the last one, but it's undeniable that his eyes move me. I can't look away.

Fortunately he breaks eye contact. I reach for my water hoping it will conceal that fact that I am blushing. I never blush! It's really annoying.

Adam opens his mouth to speak but before he can a voice interrupts him.

"Bee, there you are!"

I look up to see Owen standing by our table. He has a silly grin on his face and for a moment I question if he saw the moment Adam and I just shared.

"You're done with practice early?" He says it as a question but clearly it's an observation.

"Yeah. We're starving," I tell him.

He looks over at Adam, almost like he is noticing him for the first time. "Well, let's go. We can grab some food on the way to the Ravine."

I shake my head. "Adam, owes me a free meal," I say.

Owen furrows his brows. "Make it a rain check. We haven't hung out in awhile."

I glance at Adam. His expression is neutral. "Swiss Burger with mushrooms and a side salad," I tell him.

He looks confused for a moment and then nods with understanding. "Okay, I'll be back," he responds. He stands up and gives me and Owen a parting glance before heading to the register.

"Why did you do that for?" Owen asks, taking Adam's seat.

I frown at his presumptiveness but quickly brush it off. "I'm hungry! And it's free food."

"Do you actually like hanging out with the little _freak_?" he asks with a slight edge to his voice.

I feel a spike of anger. "We're working on a project for class. He's not that bad," I say in an even tone.

Owen snorts. "It's just that between Torres and mystery guy I barely see you these days," he complains.

I raise an eyebrow. Owen has always been kind of clingy but what does he mean by mystery guy? "What guy?"

He throws me a smug look. "I saw you the other day."

I tense up and work extra hard to keep my poker face. What did he see?

He continues, "In the parking lot yesterday, you were pretty hot and heavy with the guy you've been ditching us for," he laughs.

I look away, unsure what to say. Inside I am laughing. He doesn't realize Adam and mystery guy are one and the same.

**Adam's POV –**

"Since when are you friends with Owen?" Eli asks me, as I wait on line. I sigh. I was hoping he'd take the hint that I would talk to him later.

I turn to him. "I'm not," I refute.

Eli shakes his head. "Could have fooled me."

"Well, I guess you _don't_ know everything," I say harshly. After a moment I add, "I don't like the guy anymore than you do."

"You choose the company you keep," Eli shrugs. I really don't need another lecture from him. "Is it wise to hang out here with Bianca?"

"We're not in hiding," I retort.

He raises an eyebrow.

"I mean, people know we're on talking terms."

"Look, I'm not trying to be a hardass—"

"Then don't be one, Eli," I tell him. Peter is ready to take the next order so turn away from him. When I am done I noticed Eli has returned to his table with Clare. I am wondering if they're mad at me again when I see both Clare and Eli look at me and smile.

I walk back to the table relieved that at least things seem okay with my friends.

**Bianca's POV –**

"Our order should be ready within 10," Adam announces as he approaches the table. He looks at Owen, who is still sitting in his chair. Owen frowns at him and slowly gets up.

I breathe a sigh of relief. "Thanks. I'm going to go for a smoke," I declare. I need some air.

Owen and Adam look at me. I smirk, grab my bag, and head outside.

**Adam's POV –**

I expect Owen to follow her out but he doesn't. He stands next to me for a moment. Just when I decide to ask him if he's going outside he moves to Bianca's seat and sits.

"What are you doing?" I ask in an annoyed tone. I do not intend to break bread with Owen anytime soon.

He looks me in the eye. "You spend a lot of time with Bianca these days."

I swallow. "Yeah?"

"Look, I'm not stupid. I know something's up."

My heart beat speeds up. '_Fuck_,' I think.

"There's no way she's spending as much time with you as she claims. So tell me, who he is?" he demands.

I look at him confused, "Who?"

Owen leans in a little closer and lowers his voice. "The guy she's been spending time with. Fitz and I barely see her anymore."

I blink. Guess I'm off the hook. "I don't know," I recover.

"Don't lie to me! Is it that guy from Amherst? She knows we don't get along and if I see that fucker again I'll break his face!" he says menacingly. For once I know the rage isn't directed at me. He sounds… jealous?

"Honestly, I don't know what you're talking about," I assure him. "Bianca and I, we just dance." And we also dance in her bedroom. Naked.

He stares at me for a long moment, trying to decipher if I'm telling the truth.

I am relieved beyond measure when our food comes. A distraction from Owen's madness. I look out the window and see Bianca crushing her cigarette. The lure of food has her walking back inside. Owen stands up when she returns.

"I'll leave you to your food," he tells her graciously. I can see the relief in her eyes as well. "You and I need to hang out soon!" he iterates with a smile. Bianca smiles back and watches him leave.

"Clingy bastard," she mutters under her breath.

I raise an eyebrow. "Tell me how your really feel," I quip.

She looks up at me and smiles. "80% of the time Owen is a cool dude. But the other 20% is a bit high maintenance," she reveals.

I snort at the idea of Owen being described as 'high maintenance'.

She sighs. "Owen and I go way back. I've known him longer than we've known Fitz." She has a slightly faraway look in her eyes. She doesn't say anymore and reaches for her burger.

I smile happy to see that she has real food. It's refreshing when a girl orders an actual meal.

.

tbc

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A/N: Would totally love to hear feedback on this chapter! Let me know what you think.


	18. Can't Hardly Wait

"Can't Stop" – Part 18

Summary and additional notes in part 1.

Author's Notes: Thanks for the reviews! Here's another nice and long chapter. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Degrassi! (I'm not even Canadian…)

* * *

18-

**Adam's POV –**

We're back in her car for all of five seconds before she crashes her lips on mine. We're not far from the Dot so making out here isn't smart but the urgency to explore her mouth with my tongue wins out. I pull her closer and work my hand under her coat. It's awkward in the car due to the confined space, but I pull the zipper down so I can fondle her breasts. Bianca moans into my mouth and desire courses through me.

I am in a daze when she pulls away several minutes later.

"What time do you have to head back home?" she asks breathlessly.

I blink a few times as I try to remember. "Around six."

She glances at the clock in the dashboard. It's 5:26pm. "We could make it quick," she says. She leans in for another kiss and I hungrily capture her mouth.

**Bianca's POV –**

I knew I should have placed the car into drive, but what we were doing felt too damn good. The feel of his lips on my skin. Slow lingering kisses, building to frenzied ones full of need. Hands working around and under fabric to explore, to titillate, and pleasure.

I'm not sure how much time has passed as I throw my head back. Adam is kissing my neck. One of his hands is wrapped around my waist, steadying me. The other is massaging my bare breast. He rocks forward and moans. I have one hand down his pants. I feel the wetness as I tease him through his boxers. His response is intoxicating.

"Do you want to finish in your room or here?" he whispers into my ear. His voice is thick with desire and sends shivers down my spine.

My rational mind says we should head back to my house. Hooking up outside is majorly risky. Our saving grace this time has been the foggy windows and the fact that the sun has already gone down. Still, part of me wants to say 'fuck it' and keep going. I bite my lip and dare to glance at the clock.

"Fuck!" I exclaim aloud.

Adam jumps a little. He quickly brings his eyes to mine. "What is it?"

I soften a little, seeing the concern in his eyes. "What time did you need to be home by?"

His eyes dart to the clock. "Fuck!" he shouts. I shoot him a worried look.

"If we leave now I can get you there in ten minutes," I offer. We're not that far from Degrassi.

He moves back to his seat and sits up. "Yeah, let's do that," he says and runs a hand through his hair. This action causes me to laugh. His hair is completely disheveled and that won't cut it.

He gives me a look.

"Sorry," I say quickly. It's an empty apology because I'm still grinning ear to ear.

Adam rolls his eyes before cracking a small smile.

**Adam's POV –**

We're lost in our own thoughts as we turn onto my street. I think we did pretty good on time, well after we stopped going at it. It didn't take us long to adjust our clothes. Bianca let me use her comb to fix my hair. However, the mirror was kind of hard to see in the low light so she did it for me. My ears still feel tingly from where her fingers brushed against my skin.

I turn to look at her. She glances my way.

"What?" she asks.

My grin widens a bit. "Sorry we didn't get to finish."

She keeps her eyes on the road but I see her smirk. "Yeah, me too."

"Well, there's always tomorrow," I say. I'm pushing it, but nothing lights me on fire like the feel of her hands on me as I'm exploring her.

"Can't," she says quickly.

My shoulders sag a little. She doesn't offer me an explanation so I don't push for one.

**Bianca's POV –**

I can feel the mood shift from playful and flirty to cold and distant. Internally I debate whether or not to tell him about the family dinner Jase has roped me into. Ultimately I decide against it. I don't want to come off as weak or needy.

"Are you free Friday?" I ask.

He looks up surprised but quickly switches to neutral expression. Either way I can tell he was stunned by my question. I'm feeling bold enough not to care.

**Adam's POV –**

Did she just ask me that? Friday night people are usually off partying or on a date. I blink and concentrate on an answer that is relaxed and confident. After a few seconds I'm aware that I still haven't answered her question. '_Fuck it_,' I think.

"Yeah," I tell her, fighting the urge to wince.

"Cool," she says nonchalantly. She places the car into park. I look up startled to see we're in front of my house.

"Than—" I don't get to finish because she cuts me off.

"My family is going to be out of town," she says while looking into my eyes. "Including Jase. Why don't you stop by?"

I blink a few times before recovering. "Sure," I tell her.

**Drew's POV –**

Adam's late and I get garbage duty. How is this fair? I sigh heavily as I struggle out the door with two large trash bags.

"Crap, crap!" I mutter as I realize I left the recycling bag. I decide to head out anyway and am met with a strange sight.

I stop short at the door. Why is Bianca's car outside our house? I narrow my eyes as I study the occupants. The engine isn't running but Adam hasn't gotten out yet. He and Bianca appear to be talking.

It bugs me how friendly those two have gotten. After all the shit she's done that girl doesn't deserve forgiveness. Especially from Adam.

I sigh again. Adam is too trusting of people. It's gotten him into trouble many times. Just earlier in the semester he befriended Fitz for awhile! Anyone could have seen it was a bad idea from miles away, but my brother gave him the benefit of the doubt anyway. Bianca rejected him cruelly and caused him much public humiliation! Yet I see them talk in the halls. Exchange smiles. The past few weeks have been too bizarre. I can't wait until their project is done and life can get back to normal.

"Andrew!" I hear. I instantly grimace.

**Adam's POV –**

Bianca's smiling at me and I'm smiling back. I want to kiss her one last time before we go, but suddenly I hear my mom. I turn to the window and see her talking to Drew on the front steps.

"Shit!" I mutter.

Bianca laughs. "That was close," she observes. She turns away from me and opens her door. I stare at her like she has two heads. "Come on, let's go!"

She exits and I have no choice by to open my door and follow. When I step out of the car both Drew and my mom are on the front steps looking at me and Bianca.

"Adam, you're late," my mom says as I walk closer.

"Sorry ma'am. I'm afraid I'm to blame," Bianca says.

I fight the temptation to throw her a questioning look. My mom regards her curiously for a moment.

"And you are?" she asks. My ears perk up. I noticed there was no attitude in her voice. She sounded almost… polite.

Bianca smiles at my mom sweetly. "My name is Bianca DeSousa. I am Adam's dance partner for class."

Drew is openly glaring at her. Luckily he is standing behind our mom and she doesn't notice.

A flicker of recognition passes across my mom's face. "Oh, it's nice to finally meet you. I know that Adam has been working hard on this project."

Bianca softly laughs. Oh, the irony. "Yes. It's been a lot of work but I think we came up with pretty good routine. Adam is an excellent dancer."

She briefly looks at me and smiles. Her double meaning is not lost on me.

"That's wonderful to hear," my mom says oblivious.

"I had some errands and Adam was gracious enough to wait for me," Bianca tells her.

My mom looks at me. "That was nice of him." It's weird because I know she's actually being sincere.

"Well, I don't want to hold you up. I need to get going so I can help my mom with dinner," Bianca says. Drew rolls his eyes.

"Right, it's getting late. It was nice to meet you, Bianca," my mom says. "Let's head inside boys."

Bianca turns back towards her car. "See you in school tomorrow, Adam." Her eyes twinkle with amusement and I can tell she's laughing inside.

"Likewise. Get home safe!" I say sweetly, playing along. As I walk up the steps I see Drew standing by the door frowning.

"What the hell was that?" he spits out.

I laugh and shrug. "Lighten up, Drew!" I clap him on the shoulder and then continue inside.

.

tbc


End file.
